Funny Jokes : GM Like Computer Industry

At a recent COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with

the auto industry and stated that:

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all

be driving $25 cars that got1,000 miles to the gallon."

General Motors has issued a press release stating:

1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new

car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
would just accept this, restart and drive on.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause your car

to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall

the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car XP" or

"Car 2000". But then you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times

as fast and twice as easy to drive, but would only work on 5% of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning light would be replaced by

a single "general car default" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and

refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the

key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand

McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor

want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's

performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for

investigation by the justice dept.

12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn to
drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same

manner as the old car.

13. You would press the "start " button to shut off the engine.